Smack your alarm clock, and take stock of a room only half accepting of your freshly awakened presence.When your bedroom looks more like the grim environs of Lord Voldemort's office hours than your favorite familiar living space, you know you have been awake for under ten seconds. It sucks. But, you must be tired after all that dolphin riding with Sinbad and your deceased Uncle Jeremy, so kick off those dream shoes and march off into the morning sun.
What is over the horizon?
What is that shadowy beast lurching just over the hillside?
Where did all these tastefully rusted Honda Civics come from, and why am I holding a mechanical pencil?
Welcome to Community College, pardner. Sheriff DiscountHigherEducation will take 'er from here.
Before we get to picking apart Community College like a plate of generally "okay" General Tso's chicken, lets point out the cheery sides. As the apt name would suggest, communities in possession of a Community College are a better place for it. Ambitious freshmen and dogged senior alike inject capital, youthful energy and economic diversity to a region that would, in many cases, be bereft of...just about anything.
The rarity of an established public or private institution of higher learning within any influential proximity to a community college demonstrates this weird phenomenon. Has your town/hamlet/city/space colony recently weathered a jab of job loss? Is your state university farther than a dolphin ride with Sinbad away? Where there is a circle hole, some adventurous investor will always have a circle peg. So goes America, so goes Community Colleges. What? Your awesome, sprawling Hogwarstian State University is located just a few block away from the James T. Kirk Technical School of Intergalactic Sexual Irresponsability? Well, sometimes your friend's bathroom yields a royal wealth of toilet paper and autumn-smelling doilies, and sometimes you stare at a miserable looking brown roll, humbly suggesting you roll the devil's dice and use the last tattered squares of toilet paper sadly clinging onto it. The universe is an uncertain place.
Who wants to hear about community college? ....Bueller?......Bueller?
Me either. More later.
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